Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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