i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
high people should be assigned attendants
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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