Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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