she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I fill condoms, not promises.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
