When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize