The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
