I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
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