just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize