His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
