ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
