The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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