I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize