plz talk dirty to me
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
