we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
