She is in my trunk
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
