We named our party play list daddy issues
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
