WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
