in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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