Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
