Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
