Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize