You really coming over, don't trick.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
