she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Randomize
