Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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