This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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