i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
