But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
