And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
