I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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