I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
