The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Also, beer. Big fan.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
