I just made out with a guy for $7.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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