we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
operation harelip BJ is a go
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
