I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
