absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize