Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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