I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize
