everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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