He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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