You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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