just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
