I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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