I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
