no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
