I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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