nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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