He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
