Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
