I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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