Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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