didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize