Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
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